You have everything to give you a comfortable happy normal life. A loving husband, an adorable child, a nice and warm extended family. A house to live in (although rented), three meals a day (with the possibility of more), nice clothes to wear, a car to drive in. You have everything what any human needs to have. But still you feel this 'shoonya'(zero) inside you sometimes that none of these things or people are able to fill.
What is it that we look for beyond all this? Or is it only us who create this 'shoonya' looking for something beyond all this? Will this 'shoonya' really exist if we are truly happy with what we have?
When I am going through this 'shoonya' phase I like to be all alone. Just ALONE. No child, no husband, no music, and basically just nothing around. A while ago I was feeling this 'shoonyata' inside me. Hubby was busy watching TV and Betu was sleeping. So I just decided to take a stroll outside.
It was 8 PM. The initial signs of the onset of winter have started to show already. And that too quite suddenly. There was this slight mist in the air along with the touch of coldness. I liked it. And as I was walking I was wondering about this 'shoonya' which I believe everyones feels once in a while. I wondered if 'shoonyata' is same as 'tanhayee'. Probably not. 'I felt Tanhayee' is related to people around you. 'Shoonyata' is not. 'Shoonyata' goes beyond people.
Somehow I think I cannot decipher this 'shoonyata' ever and find the means to overcome it. Anyone to do that, needs to rise beyond the life of a normal human being.
P.S. I don't know if I'm making any sense here but I just poured out whatever was going in my mind right now.