What is exactly the meaning of "let go"? If we go by the definition of a dictionary, it says "Release, as from one's grip" and another one says "Be relaxed". In the context that I'm writing this post, both these definitions go hand in hand.
I feel we have to learn to "let go" at every stage of life. Its much easier to "let go" till we are kids, a tad bit difficult to as we are in out late teens and a lot more difficult when we are adults and/or parents. And the toughest is when your kids are adults themselves.
For some it comes with no effort, for some with a bit of effort and for some lot of effort. And yeah, then there is this other category for whom the words "let go" don't even exist. Because they do not believe in such a concept. The last category of people who can never "let go" will be the subject matter of this post.
I've written once about my personal experience with a colleague in my previous company.
I think the worst situations that I have personally seen are with parents not letting go when their children are adults themselves and even when their kids have become parents too! Just because they have given birth to their child, it doesn't mean that they will 'OWN' them all their life.
And it can be really frustrating for the people to handle such parents who are just not willing to let go. Who want to keep the remote control of their children's lives in their own hands. Despite the fact that they are living in two separate cities. They are the parents who want that their children should consult them even if they are planing to buy something as simple as TV.
And then there are parents who expect that their children should respect them. Why do they get offended if their children eat their dinner by 9 PM and not wait for them till 12 AM when they are coming from a different city? It is taken as being disrespectful.
Why is it taken in the wrong sense if their children decide the menu of a party, without 'consulting' them, which their children are throwing for their friends, where they will not be even present?
I feel in such situations even close relationships start to feel like a burden. You can feel the strain in the relationship which is so very unhealthy. And I wonder is it really that hard to let go? I, as a parent, would never want to be like the parents I talked about above. I'm sure no one would like to be - intentionally or unintentionally.
We all should learn to become unrestrained and be relaxed about it too. Coz if we do not learn to relax after letting go, the whole purpose is defeated.
A while ago I read a post from Sunita where she has also written about this parent-child relationship and how the parents do not accept decisions taken by their own children. They take it as their children have disobeyed them.
I've read and heard of so many cases when parents do not let go of their angst against their children who have taken decisions of choosing their life partners without the consent of their parents. Not even after so many years when they see that the decision their child has taken was so right. And the only reason I can attribute to such behaviours is 'ego'.