DH says I've become overly temperamental these days. I get really really angry at the smallest of things. Be it with him or with Anirudh.
To some extent I agree with him. For e.g when Anirudh was moving around a lot and not sitting at the place I was telling him to while feeding him his dinner, I got really angry and shouted at him. But I didn't realise how angry I had gotten till DH told me so and asked me not to shout on Anirudh so much.
But why have I become like this? It seems quite contrary to the current situation when work is light and I come back home early. I should be happier and thus not getting angry so much. I did think a lot about it yesterday night but somehow could not really pinpoint what it was. Maybe its not just one thing but a mix of many.
One thing which I did realise has gone wrong with me is if I have become a bit finicky about things and where and how they should be placed. If hand towel is not where it should be, I get angry. If the slippers are not where they should be, I get angry. If I find the bathroom all strewn up, I get angry. If Anirudh doesn't listen to me, I get angry. If washing machine gives trouble, I get angry. If things don't go the way I plan them to be, I get angry....
I can go on and on and list down hundreds of other things but that's not what I'm trying to do. I want to know the reason behind my behaviour and how can I correct it.
I've a caring husband and the most adorable child I could have ever asked for. We both have decent jobs, not so hectic work environments, quite an easy lifestyle since we are living as a nuclear family then what is it that irritates me and makes me start boiling up so much and so often?
Is it a phase? Will this go away? On its own? Have any of you felt the same as I do? Were you able to resolve it? If yes, how? I still have to find answers to my behaviour. I really want to. Hopefully soon.
Ohh ..another post on same topic. I did one and read one on SM's. Whats wrong with us is what we should figure out. Why we take all this unneccesary stress :(
ReplyDeleteI dont like things not working out the planned way. I get pissed off and shout and crib and sometimes cry too.
God knows whats happening..*sob* *sob*
oh oh oh this could so easily be me writing. :-(
ReplyDeleteAnd I cannot say that me and Hubs have stress free jobs. but yeah, while my husband understands, I do wish I could hold my tongue for the sake of my poor dear Sonny boy, who is getting used to a Momma who is quite badtempered most of the time.
Hugs, NM, and I hope this passes.
been there, felt that.
ReplyDeletehttp://thekronicles.wordpress.com/2007/05/30/two-oh/
some of the comments are insightful.
some time ago a friend of mine was talking to me about the same situation and recently told me that she overcame her situation by setting out newer goals for herself. she says that once she started out on achieving the new goals, her annoyances stopped happening completely...
ReplyDeleteher formula has worked for me too though my life isn't half as hectic as yours :-D in a way, i think these annoyances are also our mind's way of telling us that we need to keep it engrossed or it will drive us crazy :-D
I dont have answers to your questions! But if you do get them please share :((
ReplyDeleteBut I am feeling relieved to know there are many like me!!!
Are you sure you feel perfectly fine about yourself - your life, who you are, who you think you are? I think that most of the time when we think we are dissatisfied with the world around us, it comes back to some deep hurt or unresolved emotion within ourselves.
ReplyDeleteGood luck, NM!
I am responding to this post a couple of months too late, but I just came across your post. Its relieving to know that there are many others like me who do get irritated like I do and for the same reasons.
ReplyDelete