Thursday, June 28, 2012

In her own words

In continuation with my previous post, I'm sharing the detailed and exact account in the words of my friend.

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This post contains language, four-letter word language. These are my words and my account. Most of the exchange was in Hindi, nearly everything I shouted was in English.


23rd June, afternoonish, I board the metro from Noida City Center. The train was almost empty, I find a spot by the right side of the car near the door, put my earphones on and prepare to wait through all the stations till Rajiv Chowk. Few stations afterwards, I feel someone hovering, I turn to look and this guy wearing shades is leaning towards me, his arm extended above me brushing my head, holding the seat railing, his breath fans my hair. I look beyond him, the coach is still relatively empty with plenty of space for someone to stand comfortably without being forced to lean on another passenger and breathe down their neck. I assumed he wanted to get off at the next station and waited. Station arrives, we are standing to the right of the coach, the doors open to the left and he doesn't move.

I ask him now, do you wish to get off at the next station?
He answers in negative and looks away. I continue to address him, please step back you are crowding me.
He ignores me. I speak again.
He turns and says, why are you here, you should be in the women's coach.
I tell him, women do not have restrictions on travelling cause they apparently can travel in decency, step back please.
He continues to ignore me and doesn't move.

Another guy standing to the front us says to 1st guy, when she's asking you to move why don't you just move?
2nd guy says, what is it to you? You are her what?
They start arguing. 2nd guy says to 1st guy, hey! speak to her however you want but speak to me with respect!
Interesting how suddenly the dynamic of the situation changes. It's about respect, not towards me but to his manhood.
Sufficiently angered they start shoving each other.

I try to turn away and ignore them hoping they will stop and quit being assholes. But it escalates. The other passengers are watching but not really doing anything to stop the fight. In a matter of seconds it turns horrifically ugly, 1st guy smashes his fist into 2nd guys face and 2nd guy falls to the floor, blood gushing out of his nose and forehead. The other passengers go wild. Few turn to me and start shouting, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU STARTED THIS FIGHT, THIS IS ALL BECAUSE YOU CAME INTO THIS COACH.

I'm a little surprised and I try to tell them, I am not the reason they started fighting cause 1st guy didn't speak with "respect" to 2nd guy. Of course no one is listening. The crowd is a frenzy. The 2nd guy get up off the floor, blood dripping everywhere, no one helps him. One of the passengers steps up to me and shouts, DO SOMETHING THIS IS YOUR FAULT STOP THEM FROM FIGHTING. Can you imagine stepping in between 2 aggressive physically violent men and trying to stop a fight? Me, a girl? When all these other men in the coach haven't yet made ANY moves to stop the fight!? The train stops at Akshardham station and 1st guy runs out. 2nd guy starts calling his friends and runs out as well. The crowd is screaming at me to call the cops. My shock is a delayed reaction, but it finally sets in. I am supposed to call the cops? If I was in an accident am I supposed to call the ambulance? I dial 100, networks choppy no surprises there. Someone answers, I give the details, which station, 2 men fighting, badly hurt. The guy on the other end of the line hangs up. I can't believe this is happening to me, I'm standing here in a coach with 50 odd men and they are all shouting at me.

- YOU WOMEN ALWAYS DO THIS, YOU STARTED THIS FIGHT
- I did not start anything, I spoke up because he wouldn't move!
- WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE GO TO THE WOMEN'S COACH
- I have as much right to be here as any of you. I'm not the reason the government made separate coach for women.
- YOU ARE THE REASON, GET OFF
- The reason is men like you who cannot respect women and instead of stepping up to stop harassment you encourage it by segregating us.

Yes. I shouted these words. Perhaps not coherently. Perhaps not eloquently. I couldn't understand how even one individual out of all these people didn't have the decency to REALLY see what had happened and try to stop it. My disbelief had turned to royal fucking rage. There were a few women, who looked on like how you glance back at road accidents. I shouted at them as well, shame on you for standing there, this happens to you too and you don't have the balls to say a word now. My head was a screaming mess of thoughts, my heart felt it will explode. Strangely even though my knees were shaking like hell, I felt a strange compulsion to stay and not flee. There's a button by the door for emergencies. I recall this hours after the incident. The crowd wouldn't let up. Every time the coach doors opened and new passengers got on they ask about all the blood on the floor, everyone starts pointing fingers at me, SHE STARTED A FIGHT BETWEEN 2 MEN. WHY DON'T YOU GET OFF, GET OFF GET OFF GET OFF!!!! After 3-4 more stations I'm trying really not to fucking loose it. I continue to stand by the door.

One man in the back shouts, Ladkiyan to hoti hi aisee hain... I turn to see who spoke, he's hidden between passengers... wo dono pit gaye par isko koi asar nahi huya.
I turn back, FUCK YOU!
Another man from the front of the coach jumps out, HEY SHOW SOME RESPECT!!
- Respect????? I'm aghast. Respect to whom? You all stand around and do nothing and I said fuck you so now you want to teach me respect.
- YOU WILL SHOW RESPECT.
- All the men all the time keep saying vile abuses, maa bahen ki gaaliyan and NO ONE SAYS ANYTHING TO THEM. I said fuck you, so you want to teach me respect!

I'm glad he didn't dare. I do not know what I would have done. I start clapping and giving everyone the thumbs up, THANK YOU EVERYONE, brilliant display of support, I feel so good about my country. Keep it up.
I'm sure they all thought I have gone completely mad. I was mad. Stark raving mad. But I stood there listening to them talk and laugh and stare at me. I wondered why I wasn't crying or falling apart. My shock was tremendous, my disappointment crippled me. Frozen I continued to stand by that door.

7 stations later I get off at Rajiv Chowk. I do not know why I didn't just get off before. I probably should have. But I felt at that point, perhaps stupidly now that I have hindsight, no fucking force on earth is going to make me feel like a victim, I'm not going to get off, I have as much right to be here as any one of these barbaric men. My knees wouldn't quit shaking by the way, I felt as if I had no oxygen. I didn't want to report it. I didn't want to do anything. I just wanted to be left alone, that's all I had asked. Thinking back I cannot still understand how literally the most ridiculous thing turned so ugly. I'm sure you are thinking, why did she do this, why didn't she just leave, why did she even get in the general coach, what was she wearing, what does she look like to elicit such an incident. And you know what, that's precisely the whole fucking point. It doesn't matter what you think might be a cause or a reason. No one, NOT A SINGLE person had the balls to step up and help me. And all these 50 odd men, your regular joes, college kids, engineers going to office shouldering laptops, salesmen and just normal folks commuting.

I have never felt this alone.

And for the record, I'm AGAINST the separate coach for women. It is the most ridiculous solution the government came up with to ensure women traveler's safety. Segregating men and women will never help anyone develop tolerance and respect for others PERSONAL SPACE.

Thank you for reading.

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49 comments:

  1. Wow! Kudos to your friend. I can't imagine the courage that she displayed! My survival instinct would have made me get off at the first possible stop.
    I recently only said WTF aloud to myself when I was pissed at a male hotel receptionist/manager who wouldn't take me seriously. That got him all riled up. Thankfully, my uncle was present to smooth his ruffled feathers. I don't know how he would react if I had said 'fuck you' instead!

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  2. so, the government thinks it is justified for men to treat women like this that they need a separate compartment..... yes,where is thew world going?!! I am shocked, honestly much more at that.
    That people are scared is not new, it is the same here too. I remember recently there was a campaign in the trains to show courage and not watch helplessly after an incidents of violence in local train where a man who tried to protect someone died of his injuries.
    But that the police hung up. goodness!
    Ithink that is another thing one should go to the newspapers about it.

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  3. And it was totally right if her and courageous too not to leave. my best wishesto her....

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  4. Maan.. this story is so scary... Your friend has a lot of courage. This incident is inspirational

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  5. Read the original blog posted on Jun 27th, then this one posted next day with more details. All the time I was reading it, I was aghast by the way public reacted. I agree you had all the right to be in the general car and someone trying to take advantage should have been shown the door by the people. Before i say anything else, I want to say I totally agree with you and feel ashamed at the behavior of fellow Delhites

    But I couldn't help thinking of something all through... Another woman who feels I should have my own reserved coach anid yet the right to enter the general coach as well. Thankfully, you clarified this in the end. This is a point I have raised umpteen times why have reservation for women in metro/bus etc. I know women have to bear a lot because of some perverts in the society, but segregating the sexes is no solution. In fact what is required is to stand together and tackle the handful of miscreants, not as man or woman, but as fellow citizens. That in my opinion is true equality!

    In the end, I agree with your decision to stand your ground. Believe me, at the moment you may have questioned yourself but if you had left, it would have simply meant conceding to the wrong and encouraging the thought process of those 50 people. I cannot quite relate to your experience, but I show my deep respect to you and your decision to stand your ground

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  6. I feel ashamed to have been born in a world surrounded by such men.

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  7. few months back, I remember reading another incident involving a female in Delhi metro. I guess it was on the Gurgaon line. I also remember its spreading to lots of people and people forming cell phone networks to step in and help in this kind of situation. When I say - people I mean both "Men" and "Women". Neither of them are helpless, nor all men pigs. But certain a huge section of it has decayed into grumbling advantage seekers.

    Till such time that we will just keep commenting on a blog, facebook pages and showing off bravery in words, world is not gonna change. However little, if we all strive to change the wheel will surely turn for better.

    Starting with your kids, friends and people in your circle of influence. I am doing my bit - lets see how many more does so !

    And btw - How she felt is perfectly normal - what she did was as civilized as humanely possible - and certainly deserves a standing ovation for courage !

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  8. I would say shame on such people who try to bother and hats off to you and indeed your courage

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  9. Kudos to your friend. I'm glad she stayed on the train till her station. And i'm glad she shouted at the people on the train. They weren't 'man enough' to stand up for her against another man - so they took their frustration at their impotence out on her.

    You know, it was very tempting to say "if this was bombay, this wouldnt have happened... delhi is the rape capital, after all"... but the fact of the matter is that men are equally disgusting and apathetic all over India. The only difference probably wouldve been that if there were Mumbaikar women in the compartment, they would've slippered that asshole!

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  10. So, 1st guy intervened to stop the sexual harassment of the girl by 2nd guy and then it turns ugly between the two? And the girl thinks BOTH guys - not just the abuser but also the one who intervened - is an "asshole" and the same. Okay. Nice. Rather than dismissing the guy who actually had balls to stand up to the despicable groper as an "asshole", shouldn't she have atleast stood by him against the perv? This is the problem with women. They expect all men to speak up for them but after things
    turn ugly, they don't speak up for the man who spoke up for them. Of course, the 50 passengers' behaviour is equally pukeworthy as well. They didn't intervene at first, they had no right whatever to shower their wisdom on her, later. Should've kept their mouths shut.

    My response in a similar case would be cold indifference. If I'd intervened, most probably I'd get brutally beaten to death by the molester gang. And the girl would simply take off and forget me forever. She wouldn't show up at the court to testify in my favor, against the bastards. All accused will be set free for lack of evidence. My family would be ruined. So, no thanks. 5 years ago, my response would be different. But, now I have my priorities right.

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  11. That happens in Delhi only. Everyone just want to rape a girl, from 13 year old to 90 year old men.

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  12. I think the first guy did stand up for the girl but the whole fight went personal. As much as the girl is expecting people to stand up - she should have stood up for the second guy coz it was as much her problem as it was his. Imagine if he never stood up and the first guy continues to harass this girl and the crowd never stood up either. Of course he talked about respect because the whole conversation was civil until the first real "asshole" made it ugly.

    That was the girl's chance to do something about her situation. I'm not trying to justify the crowd going passive and finding a wrong reason to support. Thats never justified. I know you were under stress to respond but i think you should have the courage to stand up for the guy who stood up for you. encourages people to support.

    You can never be trained to handle these situations but i think there is slight opportunity to make a point and we must be calm enough to grab that.

    The Anon - couple of comments above also explains the same point and obviously so.

    So if you expect some one to stand up for you - it's correct that they expect you to support them.

    That said, it's sad the remaining crowd never thought through this.

    -Sree

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  13. Hi i feel pathetic after getting to know about this whole incident for a few reasons which are as follows:-

    First of all we live in a highly differentiating society that bears piquing contrast in the mindsets. This is a place where no human sensitivity makes a place amidst the growing nouveau riche trend. On one side you will still get to see about &0 percent of this country racing out of their homes early morning to find a place of comfort to shit other people's wits out, on the other hand there are people who would even sell their skin to siphon out money by any possible means, so as to get richer and the latest jacuzzi's installed in their frigging bathdiums (stadium sized bathrooms).

    So it is no shocking to experience horror from people coming from both sects.
    One sect treats women as treated in countries like haiti, somalia, etc. while the other sect tries to presume with responsible beliefs that it fails to bring into practice.

    Secondly, women should take it into their own hands to defend themselves as the hollow hearts of teh so called sensitive gutsy men are trapped in their balls when it comes to taking a stand for humanity, it is so the case even when incidents of this sort happen with females in their company, men lack big time in guts.
    better is that women start using pepper sprays and electric shock containers on such sick pricks.


    Have a lot more points to state but running out of life...so be empowered by the self to empower your world.

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  14. I'm sorry but I feel the guys were right. You should have stayed with the other ladies in the womens coach.

    I just don't understand why women are allowed in a mens coach. In mumbai, if a male above 12yrs tries to enter a womens coach, he will get scratched and pushed outside immediately. Yet women are so inconsiderate that they come in mens coach without any shame and stand between making puppy faces, expecting a man will get up and give her a seat which usually happens(maa ji ko seat de do).

    I was sitting in a bus alongside my mother and this women comes up to me and points out that im sitting in a reserved ladies seat. I was so outraged at the system that I got without saying a word. My poor loving mother didn't understand what happened and started asking me why I got up blah blah.

    The hell with all you women. You are like kids who needs protection. You should be treated like kids and the law treats you like kids. A man seduces you and can't do anything about it but cry afterwards. I read a controversial line in a hindu text which says how a women needs guidance and care throughout her life, by her father(when she is a child), by her husband(when she is a wife), and finally by her son(when she is old).

    I now completely understand what that line means and its importance but I can't help but be very angry at women and my obligatory duties as a male in this world.

    You women have it easy yet you b!tch and you b!tch and you b!tch.

    Fk your kind cause men cannot afford to be bums in this indian system.

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  15. Jitesh - You just said "Fuck" to your mom :)

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  16. arre dont worry about my mother you just remember to stay in your ladies coach always screaming scratching and biting other women that is why they gave you uncivilized crazies a separate reserved cage but unsurprising that some are still leaking their way to the mens coach pathetic creatures

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  17. Jitesh - With a person like who has such thoughts and attitude everyone will have to be concerned about your mother.

    If you have the guts go and say the same thing to her and then come back here.

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  18. Jitesh - Shame on you. You are everything that is wrong with the world. Pond scums like you should rot in prison for having such ignorant, hateful and insensitive thoughts because its only a matter of time before you commit crimes against women. I feel very sorry for every woman who has the misfortune of crossing paths with you, including your mother.

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  19. This is a sad and a Shocking incident where people are trying to blame your friend and not looking at the root cause (Harassed by bad guy at first) no one blamed him for the incident and the guy anyways tried to act even if for other reasons got beaten up. I feel guys esp. in Delhi NCR region are crude and insensitive and do not have respect for women… I am against the concept of a separate coach for women this way man will never learn to live will women and it also creates a mindset that 90% coaches should be used by men. In Calcutta metro there are no separate coaches and people travel in harmony. Hats off to her...

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  20. This is so irritating. I'm aware that every women on earth is incapable of having a civilized discussion and is atleast mildly psychotic but i was not aware that they also have an slight attention deficit disorder. This must be why you keep pulling out my mother(maa behen) in every other sentence.

    You think I'm the one who has problems when you have reservations in every vehicle, department, gulli and nukkad? I know what your definition of egalitarianism is - we all males should quit the general compartment also and travel on roof tops.

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  21. Bingo! Its irritating.

    The names and the types you keep calling women, well your mother is also from that same type. Bura laga jab apni ma ki baat aayi?

    And to clarify...this is not a campaign against guys. This is against people who disrespect others. For whom their self their respect is what matters only.

    If we replace the second guy with a female, my opinion would still remain the same. Get it?

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  22. Again with my mother? Leave my mother she is just a bystander in all this and non-participatory in any form of feminazi politics.

    A womens reserved coach is an entitlement for the women kind. Whereas men don't have any such reserved entitlements. So naturally, men have to fight for everything in the general public space. Have you ever seen men coming inside a ladies coach and claiming the seats as their reserved entitlements? No you don't!!! So enjoy your freebies and stfu women.

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  23. Your mother is also a woman? Right? So whatever you are saying for other woman you are saying for her too. That's all I'm trying to bring to your attention.

    I suggest you go and check the dictionary for the word "General". Does it say its only for men?

    I guess you should start your own campaign for having a separate Men compartments. Trust me we would be very happy to support it. :)

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  24. Jitesh,I think the author made it pretty clear she is against the women's compartment.That it is not the point.The incident could have happened anywhere.
    Perhaps there should be a disgruntled,misogynist,old men compartment

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  25. Yes my mothers a women thank you for bringing it to my attention sherlock holmes.

    Men don't need a separate coach because men believe in a thing called "egalitarianism". Men don't pour out their personal problems into the constitution. The only reason women have separate coaches is because an indian man somewhere in history let his sympathetic male compassion get the better of him.

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  26. There's no use saying that you are against female reservation because you already have it. It is tantamount to mockery of the situation.

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  27. Elementary dear Watson! :)

    Now you are contradicting yourself. So decide what you want. earlier you said women should not get into 'General' coaches - meant for all. So that implies you want a coach where only men should be there. So isnt that demanding a mens' compartment?

    Aapki vocabulary to bahut shaandar hai par lagta nahi ki aap proper meanings jaante hain. So let me help you with that.

    "egalitarianism - The doctrine of the equality of mankind and the desirability of political and economic and social equality"

    If you had read my post I'm also demanding NO SEGREGATION by creating women compartments. I'm also demanding equality. If there are 6 coaches and separate coaches are required, why 1 out of 6 is for women? Why not 3?

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  28. Hahaha!! wow,you are so misogynistic that you are actually funny! I suggest you try and be a stand-up comedian.

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  29. It's your opinion that im "contradicting yourself". I was very clear and explicit about what I wanted to say. When you convert "words" into "action", you have basically put the ball rolling. When women were given their own separate coaches(turning some general coaches into women coaches), it was very natural for the men to feel encroached and you see this anger come out in the form of this incident with your friend.

    Meri vocabulary aapse bahut zyada hai. Bolna acha nahi lagta par kya karun, ye saach hai.

    In fact, you might be well aware of this strategy. It's called "divide and rule". Our ancestors played it well against each other(princely states) prior to the fall of the mauryan empire. Sadly for indians, the firangis played it better than us. No doubt the current political administration is the true inherit of the raj. Sarry for the off topic kamment.

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  30. Jitesh : I seriously sympathize with you. May be you need a reservation , coz may be you hate women so much that you cannot be comfortable with them.

    This post was not about one person , man or woman , it was about mindset. But you cannot look beyond your thought process. You are one among those 50 passengers.

    I suggest nm , pls dont waste your time with this guy. He needs help from a physcologist. He is one of those hypocrites for whom mom and sisters are one category of women and rest are rest :P

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  31. Jitesh - Main to khud bol rahi hoon ki aapki vocabulkary bahut zyaada hai aur achhi hai. :)

    And to quote you - "When women were given their own separate coaches(turning some general coaches into women coaches)," - There is just one coach in a train of 6-8 coaches. So its singular. Not plural.

    Its you who want divide and rule. You say women should stick to women coach and not come into men's err general coach. So I can see the long lasting imprint the britishers left. Its continuing even after so many years of independence through people like you.

    I've been trying hard to emphasize that the point of the post was NOT against men. It was against the mentality..the attitude. But I guess even after saying it again and again and again its not getting through you. And yes I accept I lost. I guess your mommy will do a better job at it. *Keeping my fingers crossed*

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  32. Nm,don't waste your time on this guy.It's like banging your head against the wall.

    And Jitesh,you obviously are insecure to such a degree that you hate all women out of sheer frustration,I know a good psychiatrist.It's a woman. :D

    AH! I HAVE GOT IT! You have a SMALL WILLY!

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  33. @~nm
    I'm from mumbai where there is a reserved female coach in the front and in the back.

    Like I already said, the ball has been sent rolling. The problem is that you do not understand the extreme severity of this event.

    @others
    You're a bunch of trolls. When you talk personally about a commenter instead of the subject of this post then it amounts to classic textbook trolling.

    PS: Very classy there women. My willy is ~4in flaccid and around 6in hard. So while it may not be like the one in the naughty movies, I'm very sure that size and girth has very little chance when you have a lazy cow that just lays there doing absolutely nothing. But then no man does it for the sake of making her feel good. No one takes a dump and wonders why the toilet seems distracted.

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  34. Ah how we dislike being slighted.Funny,how you call other people trolls when you yourself have been generously throwing around insults against ALL women instead of talking about the issue at hand.So it is o.k to do that but it's not o'k to insult you.I see.

    The fact that you gave a description of your penis just reinforces the fact that you are insecure.

    I expect you'l have a rude,misogynistic reply ready,seeing that you seem to have the infantile need to have the last word.

    Nm,your friend was courageous.
    It takes time for a society to change it's mindset as a whole.For some( as demonstrated above) it will never happen.It is best to ignore such people, and continue to speak up . Have a nice day :)

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  35. I HAVE been taking about the issue. The colonization of general compartments into ladies compartments is a serious threat from all women kind to the non-women kind. When a women travels in a general compartment, she unconsciously threatens the already limited pool of general space available for the rest of the public. How many of you women are guilty of traveling in a general compartment? Hain ji? Hain?

    Just a few comments ago, many of you had no problem talking about my family and my willy size but as soon as a I pitch in, you point it out and label me "insecure". Nice.

    Women can never have the last word because women are incapable of having the last word. Women have no idea what they’re talking about at all times. Arguing with a women is a waste of time and a women values time just like a trash can values expensive untouched continental puke shit. Women are always wrong. Women get lucky once in a while and act like complete cunts about it, but remember this: even if a woman is right, she’s wrong. If we really took feelings and rational thought coming out of this same womens yap at face value then I might as well call my willy jimi hendrix.

    Last word ladies. This argument is over. Like any other womens story, this womens story too had no fking point. Good job women.

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  36. Hey Jitesh!

    You won't believe this buddy but by pure luck I found this blog that wrote about you! Yaar, dil khush kittah si! Should have told us sooner that you are this famous!

    I encourage everyone, especially the women here to read this account of Jitesh. And stop harassing him, he has valid reasons for the way he is! Please girls, thoda understanding eh?

    http://kaapizone.blogspot.in/2012/07/day-in-life-of-pervert.html

    Aaj Ka Mard

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  37. @AnonymousJuly 5, 2012 8:20 PM

    I'm not surprised. These indian broads might be spending a few hundred rupees to maintain a fake look on yourselves but their 5 pound brain is still jam packed with 10 pounds of shit and even more shit than it can handle. So no wonder you unintelligent organisms attract all the creeps and the weirdos from every gulli and nukkad. Again good job ladies cause you deserve it.

    And don't think for one sec that you fool me into thinking that you're a hot broad. You fat women seem to think that its a mans responsibility to make you feel good about yourselves. It's actually the total opposite so that you she-pigs can hit the treadmill for a second.

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  38. loadsa HUGSSS for your friend...

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  39. What an absolute jerk you are making of yourself man, Jitesh !! .. if you have some personal problems buddy go sort it out.

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  40. It was very courageous of your friend to stick to her guns and travel her entire course till Rajiv Chowk, rather than get off the train after being pressurized by co-passengers.

    This article has created a platform for people to voice out their opinions, and though we women keep hoping for the better future of women, it is appalling to see that there are men who disrespect women with such ease. Let us not forget that even if women enter the 'general' coaches of trains, be it Mumbai, or Delhi, or any city in this country they will never be able to outnumber the men. Women who feel vulnerable of men, travel in coaches designated only to women. But it doesn't mean that they cannot travel or are restricted from travelling in a 'General' coach. Surely, after an incident like this, more and more women would feel vulnerable travelling with strange men, and will revert to travelling in 'women-only' coaches. Thus increasing the man-woman divide/conflict.

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  41. Your friend was alone on this particular day and this particular time, but is not alone in the community of women who have gone through the same thing on the Delhi metro, or live in fear of the same thing happening, or are so disempowered that they DO feel responsible for causing such incidents and take the blame that is injustly put on them.
    I am not Indian but rode the Delhi metro consistently for 6 months last year and was fortunate never to have experienced harassment on the metro itself (I think someone from the metro followed me and proceeded to harass my husband and I, but that wasn't on the metro itself), but also felt the women's specific coach was not a solution (not even getting into the question of if women are expected to be compartmentalized into a specific car, why are so few women expected to be riding the metro compared to men?).
    But, I applaude your friend's bravery and courage in standing up, absolutely justly, in such an isolating situation and your ability to articulate the encounter so realistically. Thank you for shining a spotlight on this.

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  42. I read your first post and I posted comments (may be you dont like them) here after reading in somewhat details I have some sympathy for you but again I dont like -
    1. you used abusive language (like fuck you )and expect people to show respect for you?
    2. if you were the other women in the coach (as you mentioned) do u still believe they came forward to help you (answer honestly)
    3. men believe we have a separate coach where they cannot step but still we are boarding general coach to increase crowd in a already crowed coach (may be not relevant to this)

    but agree with you and I myself believe
    that there is a no need for women coach - has anyone noticed that not men rarely offer their seat to women (though I myself offer my seat to elderly)
    and announcement in metro"please offer your seat for physically challenged, sr. citizens and ladies" has anyone noticed Delhi Govt. itself has placed women at par with physically challenged, sr. citizens ie weaker sections of society

    any women ever noticed reserving seats for women also signifies this to show that men are superior who did not need help

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  43. So finally can i ask you one thing? What would you do if u are in the second guy's place?

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  44. Oh Wow! This Is All So Exciting!

    I Want To Participate Too... :D

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  45. Ok...

    I Apologize Sheepishly For That Comment! :-P
    But Yeah! This -->"Anonymous:August 23, 2012 4:01 PM" guy has put a completely correct point!

    i.E.What would you have done if u were in the second guy's place?
    I Guess: used my brain to turn the tide of the temperament of the atmosphere...like, you know, DISTRACTING him into something civil, no? Or coming in between the two!...for some unknown, wierd reason!!...asking him for directions...or shouting out loud for a bomb hoax, proclaiming him to be the suicide bomber, a terrorist something!

    Also the girl could HERSELF have done something to attract public's attention in altogether different light so that the general public turns against him!

    Hey! Why didn't the girl took help of some older gentleman sitting around in the first place, by the way? Or turned to some women around for their, you know, "same-sex" support?

    Intriguing!

    P.S.: If you think i'm taking it all in a lighter vein, then you're probably right! Coz you're probably not gonna get anything out of being aggresive & valiant NOW!!(obviously) So, why don't just be a little, umm, humuorus or cool-minded, if you can say? The Storm Has Passed for now...We need to chalk out some realistic, innovative ideas to deal with these incidents on our own for future! And BELIEVE ME whne i tell you...some of my ideas are not THAT BAD! Some of them DID WORK! Had witnessed it myself when some really cool young women tried 'TURNING THE TIDE'!!!

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  46. Hugs to you dear friend!so well written...You did the right thing.You deserve an applause... Keep it up....Never compromise on your rights.

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  47. Hi can the writer give me permission to reprint this in a student edition of a national newspaper in India, for which a friend and I contribute a page on social justice and peace values theme? IS there an email id where I could contact the writer?
    Thanks
    Sumathi

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    Replies
    1. Hi Sumathi

      You may contact the blogger at this email ID crochetsaves@gmail.com

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